If anyone would have told me I'd be penning
this, my response would have been a fat NO!!!
One can never foresee a back stab or blindside. I guess that's the
beauty.
Firstly it pains me to write this but its
reasons are enough motivation. This is not my 1st divorce but it still hurts. My
first divorce was a breach in the moral and social code between friends and
this divorce too, nothing different. I should have had the foresight to see
this coming as both parties are two peas in the pot (not in a good way).
The reason for our break-up is based on the
two-faced life you live at my expenses. The disregard of my life and the impact
when you talk about me, the use me to your advantage and the secrets you spread
when told in highest confidence. I'm was your best friend, thought I count on
you but time and time again you proved me wrong. I'm not lashing at you but I'm
just telling you my experience with you for the past seven (7) years. Its been
abusive, my trust in you is no longer there.
I've told you things that I knew would not
come back to me. Boy was I wrong in all occasions. A misunderstanding is easy
to resolve because it was not intentional. You deliberately telling people my
business, is a violation of my trust. Something hard to repair. I once tried to
show you what consideration, care, love and trust is, but in your nature you
got the wrong end of the stick or the wrong stick.
When we were talking about you that
day, it was borderline a concern to us based on the contents of what we knew
bout that relationship. If it was gossip, you wouldn't have known about it. The
fact that you get/ got defensive is understood. The fact that years later you
still see nothing wrong, I have nothing to say.
I'm not perfect and I don't aim at perfection
as it doesn't exist. You, out of everybody know most of my flaws and all. Hence
the betray is deeper than any romantic relationship I've ever had. I will not
say I'm better but I can admit I'm wrong and apologize. You have changed over
the years some for the good and some not so much. I can barely recognize you.
I
can barely relate to you. This has nothing to the fact that I am a mother but
because you have morphed into someone I don't recognize. I don't wanna confide
in you any more, I can't tell you anything because my heart can't take it. I
deserve the same loyalty from you as I give. The foundation of our friendship
has been violated. We share nothing in common except a history and nothing
more. I was your best-friend, a sister, a buddy and it hurts to see this
separation but I'm afraid it has to happen.
We have reached an impasse and I doubt
neither parties wanna continue living a lie. "when someone shows you their
ass, believe them, that's who they
are".
This is my hurtful experience of mistrust can do. Hope you find happiness within you to find it on others. I wish nothing but the best in life in general, i hope another 7 years will pass and see the good in my goodbye.
