The GOOD in my GOODbye.

If anyone would have told me I'd be penning this, my response would have been a fat NO!!!  One can never foresee a back stab or blindside. I guess that's the beauty.

Firstly it pains me to write this but its reasons are enough motivation. This is not my 1st divorce but it still hurts. My first divorce was a breach in the moral and social code between friends and this divorce too, nothing different. I should have had the foresight to see this coming as both parties are two peas in the pot (not in a good way).

The reason for our break-up is based on the two-faced life you live at my expenses. The disregard of my life and the impact when you talk about me, the use me to your advantage and the secrets you spread when told in highest confidence. I'm was your best friend, thought I count on you but time and time again you proved me wrong. I'm not lashing at you but I'm just telling you my experience with you for the past seven (7) years. Its been abusive, my trust in you is no longer there.

I've told you things that I knew would not come back to me. Boy was I wrong in all occasions. A misunderstanding is easy to resolve because it was not intentional. You deliberately telling people my business, is a violation of my trust. Something hard to repair. I once tried to show you what consideration, care, love and trust is, but in your nature you got the wrong end of the stick or the wrong stick.

When we were talking about you that day, it was borderline a concern to us based on the contents of what we knew bout that relationship. If it was gossip, you wouldn't have known about it. The fact that you get/ got defensive is understood. The fact that years later you still see nothing wrong, I have nothing to say.

I'm not perfect and I don't aim at perfection as it doesn't exist. You, out of everybody know most of my flaws and all. Hence the betray is deeper than any romantic relationship I've ever had. I will not say I'm better but I can admit I'm wrong and apologize. You have changed over the years some for the good and some not so much. I can barely recognize you. 

I can barely relate to you. This has nothing to the fact that I am a mother but because you have morphed into someone I don't recognize. I don't wanna confide in you any more, I can't tell you anything because my heart can't take it. I deserve the same loyalty from you as I give. The foundation of our friendship has been violated. We share nothing in common except a history and nothing more. I was your best-friend, a sister, a buddy and it hurts to see this separation but I'm afraid it has to happen.

We have reached an impasse and I doubt neither parties wanna continue living a lie. "when someone shows you their ass, believe them, that's  who they are". 

This is my hurtful experience of mistrust can do. Hope you find happiness within you to find it on others.  I wish nothing but the best in life in general, i hope another 7 years will pass and see the good in my goodbye.