Change

Finding yourself is something that can take forever, i mean things that you loved when you were a kid to a teenager to now are all different and some are just ridiculous when you look back, but they made the person you are today.

Some of us are the loving kind (me included), we give love, when we are in a relationship we give it 100%, our work 100%, friendships 100%, God 200%(or whoever you praise), we have so much to give that its normal to love someone and not nag about their flaws.

I once overheard my brother telling his friends that "mosadi ke motho o mongwe oreng ha a rata monna abe a morata ka pelo yothle" meaning women are the only human beings that give love to their partners with an open heart regardless of past experiences. Its true and funny enough we do this all the time even to the blokes that have hurt us a gazillion times, not (hopefully) because we think we can change them, but we have HOPE!! (keep hope alive, LOL)

I just realised that im scared of being alone, ive been alone for the past 14 year due to Gods will so it kinds terrifies me to think that the i'll be alone till the end of time. Its not that ive built the great wall of china with three layers of stainless steal around me but simply its hard to find a decent guy. Not only that, im a buddy not a lover to some, i like it but loneliness is my fear.

With all of that i found me, the strong, independent, smart, funny, loving, sexy, self. It didn't take me two months to be where i am, it took a while, even now im still discovering things about myself and some of them are a bit disappointing.

But hey its life you cant have them all, to embrace my single-hood, i make me happy, i make sure before anything or any one i encounter i must first be sure if i want to do it, second, will i be happy and thirdly what will i learn from this?

Its not an easy task but hey, someone has to do it. Ladies, please take time to find out more about yourself in any aspect as you can discover. Learn to love you the way you are, if theres something you don't like,change it or shut up...

Theres nothing thats unattractive like a woman with issues with herself and complains to others. Learn to believe in yourself, you have one life to live and make sure when you look back, its the kinda life you wish someone could relive and be proud of. Your life is like a painting, a masterpiece thats painted with life's experiences, your job as the painter is to reflect what you would LOVE to see, i don't think anyone is happy to see sadness.

Lets find those whimsical brushes and paint paintings that we could be proud to hang in our houses even in the toilet.